11.30.22
By Emily Sustaita
I’m on the edge
Of falling or staying
In a world filled
With words, people,
And emotions.
Emotions, which swing
From one edge
To the other.
Between the sun and shadows,
Between the fire and water,
It all keeps swinging,
Back and forth.
One swing –
And those words
Become hurtful.
Another swing –
And those same words
Become playful.
Stare too long –
And your mind begins to question
Each detail, each word, each second –
Turning it all into one big mess.
They’re just words! –
And yet, my mind could never
Settle on one pass –
The verdict just keeps
Changing and changing,
While the dirty words continue
To swing before me –
Never giving a clear signal.
Everything is either too complicated,
Or too simple.
I can never figure out
Which one it is.
The clouds just continue to pour thought,
And thought, after thought
Into my little brain
Until it overfloods.
I can never think straight,
My head pounds and pounds,
To the point nothing is funny
Anymore and all falls silent.
I can’t raise a single limb,
A single word out of my poor lips.
All I can do is sit there,
Letting that supposed “time”
Slip by.